Monday, December 25, 2006

i'm like and she's like and we're like

I grew up under the passive influence of "my fair lady", which means, i try to (or is it try and) speak english properly, enunciate correctly, articulate succinctly. And i always thought old habits die hard. I still haven't stopped biting my nails, or misplacing things, or tapping agitatedly at the dining table, much to my dad's consternation (he still screams my name out loud, and i still whimper a little, and just so that this information is not misleading, I must insist that I am 21 going on 22- all grown up).
I used to enjoy those mundane exercises titled "convert the following into reported speech", or "convert the following to direct speech".
Let's take an example shall we ?

convert the following reported speech into a direct sentence-

Reported - He asked me if I had finished reading the newspaper.
Direct - He asked me, 'Have you finished reading the newspaper?'
( I had such a huge temptation to say ported!!!)

Its no mean feat. Notice the comma, then the quotes, then the question mark before the quotes end, not after. Its no mean feat. And I used to do them effortlessly. There was an elegance about it that I rather liked. The majesty and the grandeur of the english language- in the inimitable style of professor Higgins.

And, then, you know what happened ?
The habit died.
Flash forward to the present, and you know what I say ?

He was like have you finished reading the newspaper ?
and that means the same thing as
He was like have i finished reading the newspaper?
which is the exact thing as
He asked me like if i've like finished reading the newspaper ?

Yes... There I've said it. I say like for everything. I'm thinking like its okay to do it on sms, because, you know, its hard to go to the special symbols table each time, and then i'm like, its okay to do it on chat, coz, you know, its like you've to press shift each time, but then, i like, do it even when i'm talking man, i'm saying i'm like this, and then someone's like oh you were like that, and i'm like no no.. not like that, i'm like {like this}.

professor Higgins will not like this no ?

Even in her worst state, Elisa Dolittle was better than me. I'm like Aishwarya Rai in Dhoom 2. And i want to be like Ash in a lot of ways. Trust me. But not like the way she's in Dhoom 2.
I'm like so sad no ?

PS : In a bid to resolve this nasty habit, I have tried to italicize only those instances of "like" where the usage is wrong. But I have no idea how deep this new habit is rooted. Please feel free to tell me if some of the italicized like(s) are actually correct (yippee) and also, if some of the ones non italicized ones are wrong (damn).

Sunday, December 17, 2006


there are better things to do
and better persons to be
than sit all night wondering why oh why
or brood "oh dear me"